If That's What It Takes (by P Cumming)

I had just got back to town
I was quietly poking my nose around
When I saw you beating up my old pal
And I said to myself "That's a hell of a girl"

Our friend introduced us, we had a little beer
Then he drove home while he could still steer
And you gave me the chill, gave me the frost
Gave me a look that said, "Boy get lost"

Then about four hours later
While I was casually drowning in gin
I looked down to see you had your hand on my knee
And you were dribbling down your chin

chorus
If that's what it takes to want me
Fill yourself up to the brink
'Cause if you've got to be drunk to love me
Don't stop to think
Go right ahead and drink

The next time we met was at a BBQ
We were standing round talking to that fella we knew
When something I said must have been misread
'Cause you looked at me like I was something dead

I wandered off wondering "How could you forget?"
I didn't realize you hadn't drink enough yet
I didn't know you didn't mean to be rude
The simple fact was you weren't sufficiently stewed

But when I found you face down in a rosebush
You sat up and gave me a wink
Then with a swig of champagne we were on again
And I knew I had found the link

So now if you ignore me
I know what I have to do
Make sure you get drunk before me
And the rest will happen on cue

So if I want to find you I don't have to look far
Just about two feet from the nearest bar
With a song on your lips and your favorite drop
And a gleam in your eye that says you're not going to stop

We could leap into an airplane, jump into a cab
Or walk down to the local and run up a tab
Or go to your house my ultimate goal
'Cause the frigidaire is rigid there with alcohol

And by the light of that silvery Simpson
You'll vaguely try to think of my name